Message From Nowhere

I should just let go.. move on.. the past will never return the future will never come.. I should let go and give in.. give in to one of those guys who clearly have some interest in me... pretend that I am what they want me to be.. it shouldn't be hard I am not that bad at acting.. maybe it will help.. to have healthy relationships for once in my life and all it takes is to pretend that I am something.. something they think I am... clearly the way I am can not be accepted.. in my own shoes I can only walk as that good friend.. as that weird good friend next to whom you can feel a little bit saner.. a little bit more normal.. a little bit stronger and more stable... I can be that good friend I fit for that role almost prefectly but nothing more... at least not while I am in my own shoes.... getting a bit sick of being constantly stuck in a confusing status.. where ever I go to whomever I turn all roads lead to confusion.... and you don't even know.. though you should have noticed but knowing me you might as well haven't... I still wonder weather or not should I write.... getting sick of being constantly confused.. wondering what do they think... what do I think.... what do I think...

I've lost something
....something
I can..... not.. find
there's a....... missing link
I'm............. incomplete
and
because of that one.... little..... thing
that's ..................been lost
the .....whole system
is falling .......................apart

lost in dust
I am ............blind
and weak
ever so ................weak
no .................ground under
my feet
I am .................................hanging